Month: December 2015

Brief quiz at intentionalliving.johnmaxwell.com  There are about 20 questions. I took quiz and found results being I’m an Advocate at heart. Most my answers, truth be told, I wanted to answer with “it depends” answer.

Take the quiz. Know more about yourself and that may aid in who you are in your waiting situation.

In our flesh, we are still waiting and waiting. We could be biting our nails because it is the last day of the year and tomorrow, bills are due. Those of us who are “deep” and trusting in God –know Psalm 42: 7 says,” Deep calleth unto deep”……

How deep are you??  How deep is your walk with Christ??

Thinking of Isaiah 42: 3……God is saying, via Isaiah, He’s sending His “elect”. Yes, He’s saying He’s sending His Son…..Jesus will not break the bruised reed. Hmmm…bruised reed…bruised humans….Humans who hurt/have been hurt could be called bruised.

In circumstances where a person is waiting, hanging on, waiting….feelings can emerge. Negative emotions can want to take over. These can seem like bruises. There can be actual bruises, but that’s for another time…..Whiney kid rises up in us and we must remember to call on God. He made us.

God knew how we’d be, since the beginning of time. He told Isaiah to write how Jesus wouldn’t break the reed, quench the flax, (hurt the fragile hurting)….. He loves us. The Enemy of our souls is the one who comes to destroy us from within and from without……

I am filled with the Holy Spirit of God……my bruises are healed, in Jesus’ name……

Thank You, God

How are you spending your Christmas Eve? Are you home? Are you in a “home”? Are you homeless? Are you getting your home ready for company? Are you at work? Are you out shopping? Are you baking?

While waiting to sell house #2, we are working hard to clean up after flea bombing. We are expecting company after Christmas. I work inside and hubby works outside. He lugs heavy bags of mulch and stuff….We are humble folk.

We await our soon and coming King…………..

Says “no weapon formed against thee (me) will prosper…..” Yes!

We were going along waiting on houses to sell, our finances to be mended, our vehicles to run correctly, and Christmas to take place…..Stress! As the Enemy would have it, I stumbled across texts in hubby’s phone. It seems customer has bonded more than she should have. That’s all I’ll say. My mind and heart knew hubby is and was totally trustworthy…..but, being human and female, this ate at me. I claimed Isaiah 54: 17 repeatedly quoting back to God that I was and am putting on/keeping on the helmet of salvation to guard my mind and thoughts. My official testimony was that my mouth got totally “saved” last week….now…..umm…negativity spewed forth to my hubby….He says “un-necessarily”. I say, “My feelings were hurt and there could be doors open to “who knows what” when men are naive with female “just friends”.

Comments?

There was no yelling, I reminded him I’d be over my “spewing” in a day. (and was) I saw this as a sideways attack. The Enemy of our souls has been at us…..we are trusting God for something huge and are waiting on Him……

We were faithful…… Today, God blessed us with a bid on one of the houses!!!! Halelujah!!!! Glory to God!!!!!!   Christmas miracle!!!  We thank God!

The situations/circumstances remain about the same….some could really stress and lose it given these. I know……But, we are still ever praying. We haven’t lost hope. At the end of this when we have our answered prayers, Or, God shows us a whole new idea and goal, ……we will give testimonies right and left: we will give testimonies galore to Gods glory. These testimonies will change peoples’ lives…..we just know it!

With other ideas and possible doubt, we now have the possibility we are just asking God as “spoiled kids”. (for lack of better word) We have to believe this isn’t the case, but, we have been presented with Psalm 106: 15 where God answered Israelites’ prayers…..but they ended up regretting this fact because they were lean in their souls and had disease and death.

No! We declare life, health and victory in our lives in Jesus’ name!

are in the power of the tongue…..Hmmm, power of the tongue…..While contemplating this fact, I’m convicted.

From now on, I will be ever conscious of the fact. I will bless the Lord at all times and His praise will continually be in my mouth.

With power of life and death in the tongue, I choose Life. I will say and write blessings: I will!!!

I am reminded of Zecharias, who was married to Elizabeth. In the Bible, he was visited by an angel who told him he would have a baby in his old age. He found this hard to believe and had a lot of questions and remarks. The angel said he would not speak for 9 months and he didn’t. Subsequently, John the Baptist was born. Had he been able to speak those 9 months, he may have caused his wife’s miscarriage……..Food for thought…..

 

We are still waiting. We still have our trials going on so hubby feels he needs to work at least 6 days a week, 16 hrs a day. This can wear a female out just waiting to see/feel love.

As females do, I issue the ultimatums, I complain….he says “you say this stuff all the time.” Well, the only thing that changes is he smiles and hugs me now and then and says this will all be different when the houses sell. Smiles, warm fuzzies, time together and I am appeased till next day when same old same old is renewed.

Am I wrong to want to feel like a priority? As I tell him, “if you would commit to spur of the moment taking some time off from the Job, I’d know it was only a job and I was/am priority”. He says, “I can’t.” I say, “You won’t.”

Normally, I’d go down depression road with these feelings but, I am just tired. My yo’yo is down and gets “up” with expectations when I see him. Inevitably I start in on the things have to change, we get tense, sometimes yell…..no one is appeased. Nothing changes.

He doesn’t know that if he possibly fake called in to work and said, “Something major has come up, I won’t be in”, I’d kiss him and feel the love and appreciation and say go on and go in to work…..What? Too many soap operas and romance novels? If so, so be it.

Dear Lord, let something Give…………

Yep, it seems when bones, joints and feet are wearing out, toes and metatarsals do too.

Everything cracks. One reference on the internet says to stay off your feet as much as possible with metatarsalgia. I’m not on em much now. Really. Oh, and it said one side effect was weakening achilles tendon. Well, had surgery for one already. The doctors were saying I have all the itis brothers….arthritis, bursitis, chronic bronchitis, chronic gastritis, diverticulitis…….Well,…..hubby seems to think “life goes on”………so on we go. He’s my rock. (he’s also 1 year younger than I)

I’m blessed. At this time, I take no pills/prescribed meds daily…….shall I discover wine???

Yes, I have a lapband…..Now, it’s not quite as you might think. I know I can get away with eating all the ice cream or creamy, buttery foods I can choke down. This doesn’t aid in weight loss….unfortunately. But, if it’s before 6pm. and I have any stress in my day, I can get “hung up”. I can get super mucussy, snotty nose, hard to breathe, spitting up mucus repeatedly. My whole body has to relax and let food go down the stoma muscle. This can take 30 minutes….It’s not fun.

I wait………My mind makes promises to itself. I promise to never eat solid food ever again. I promise to only eat candy and ice cream till I die. (because they don’t give me immediate troubles)

Wellllllll….

Questions? Comments???

We were married 9 and a half years and planned to have a celebratory anniversary trip to Niagara Falls. Our finances went further and further south. We changed our New York/Canada trip to an Ohio trip to see our grandson graduate High School. This is the first of our grand-kids to do this. We drove 1000 miles and camped in a tent. (I’m really not much of a tent person….) God blessed and the trip went without a hitch.

We came home to a friend’s memorial service. Our pastor spoke a word over me about my using my talents and imagination. This lit a fire in me. I came home to outline a sketch for a Christmas musical production: “The Phan-tastic Birth”…..in lieu of, and including, music from the Phantom of the Opera. (phantom would be there, too…)

There would be old songs, script, hymns, new Christian contemporary songs, interpretive dance…all outlined out……we aren’t doing this musical at our church this year……but maybe some day, somewhere………

As I sit waiting for answered prayer, I can be found stewing over my loneliness. I can worry about unresolved issues like the fact we bought a truck during the summer, but it’s sitting “dead” at the lot. We have not paid it off and the car lot  hasn’t repaired it. We got a Taurus a few months later and we can’t afford to pay either of the monthly payments.

Oh! But hubby works. (all the time) With all my past health and emotional issues, I’ve been officially titled “disabled”. Thank God for social security disability……ah, but the Enemy uses that term to thwart me.

gift comes down from the Father of lights. I had experienced long intervals of merely sleeping my days away. Along with my insecurities, I had lived through marriage to an alcoholic, diagnosis of hepatitis B and diabetes, and my child being a vagrant who dropped out of High School, stole from a department store and had a 2nd trimester abortion.

My hubby came into my life with magic, surprises, encouragement and unconditional love.

I thank God for him.

It’s December….many people haven’t found true love or reconnected with family this year and Christmas will be a sad time.

We weren’t able to pay the mortgage on our house last month, but have hope that it will sell and we can start fresh in another state where there’s more family and better paying jobs. If we focus on our first time ever not being able to make a payment or focus on our desires, plans, expectations, we will be downhearted. Yes, we focus on God, instead. We praise Him for what He has done and for Who He is.

In reality though, it seems like I have just set the troubles on a back burner, far away–as if they don’t exist. It seems like living in an alternate world altogether.

Oh! Living in the Spirit………ok. (not the flesh) I am walking by faith and not by sight,